Am I wrong to be upset about this?
HU-429090758
14 days ago
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littlebug Zone 5 Missouri
13 days agoHU-0228123141598721
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Karyn don't be upset that I am starting this thread
Comments (22)Lucy I'm not upset that you posted. I'm just still feeling pretty crappy and don't have the energy to get online. At least I'm out of the hospital. Hopefully I'll feel human by the end of the week. Thanks for the well wishes. It's back to bed for me....See MoreAm I wrong if I feel betrayed, hurt and upset?
Comments (4)I'm with the rest--whether you have your degree, or are 3 credits short isn't something I'd see as a big deal no matter what. And make no mistake about it--you should be FURIOUS with your husband. HE GAVE YOUR SS # OUT. That's not cool. It's so far and beyond the teeny little infraction of how close you are to graduation that it's mind-boggling. Your husband says he can't trust you? YOU can't trust him on important things. You have no way of knowing, now, how far that # has gotten, and if in years to come you're going to be dealing with identity theft. You need to make sure your husband knows that he is NEVER EVER to hand that number over to anyone, ever, without your permission. I've been married 39 years, to a wonderful man I have always trusted, and who trusts me. To this day, I will not put his SS # on anything or give it to anyone without checking with him first. It's not my place to disseminate that info--it definitely wasn't your husband's place to use it against you. You have some serious issues to handle--probably time to consult with a counselor and your own (not your family) lawyer--you have some potential legal issues here, that need to be properly handled so things don't get worse....See MoreUpset about design fee- am I unreasonable?
Comments (30)SAS, the attitude you describe is, in my experience, prevalent in the ID business. It seems a lot of folks have trouble reconciling the concept of luxury goods and value (maybe this means most luxury goods are poor value!). I also agree with the OP that it is the principle more than the cost. Nothing enrages me more than the sense that people are ripping me off "because they can". I've told the story before about the guy who quoted an AV system for our house. First he kept asking if I wasn't sure that I wanted every kid to have an AV system (I am totally sure, mister ... I don't want AV zombies). Then, when he gave me the quote, I asked him (perfectly nicely, I promise) some clarifying info about the pricing. He declined to answer and then withdrew his quote! Ahh the cast of clowns and criminals that one had to deal with in this industry! That said, IDs do hold the keys to all of the "to the trade" goodies, which I personally could not decorate without. Moreover, they do know the rudiments of scale and traffic flow and have a sense of color. I have picked some of that up but still need help with it. Lastly, a really good ID knows where to find good labor and how to manage it......See MoreAm I wrong to be totally bent about this?
Comments (24)I totally agree with you that it seems like an unfair burden for her mother to be placing on her. Please don't think that by what I am about to say that I am in any way critisizing or trying to you what YOU should do. I am simply relaying what my husband and I did, and please also understand that we expected, and received, full reciprocation from her mother and SF. When my SDs started getting into those teen years to where they began complaining about something at the other parent's house that was 'unfair'? Well, what we found is that by offering any sympathy at all, they basically saw as validation, as if we AGREED they were being treated "unfairly", and you know what happened then? Next time mommy told them to do it, they screamed, "That's not fair! Even DAD thinks so!" That actually happened, and of course, dad never said any such thing. All he thought he was doing was offering comfort to his child, who complained about having to do the dishes. His actual words were, "Oh my poor baby!" And his daughter also didn't feel she was lying, and she really wasn't, she was simply "interpreting his response in her favor", which one of the many things teenagers do. Although my husband had no intention of doing so, his daughter interpreted his words of comfort as agreeing with her that her mother was being unfair--which triggered her to become defiant, rather effectively undermining her mother's authority, creating a disciplinary problem. Didn't matter that it was completely innocent, it had the same effect as if he had intentionally "badmouthed" BM. Now, if anything had gone on at their mother's house that was harmful, dangerous or illegal, most certainly we'd want to hear about it. But "unfair"? Well, what is fair or unfair is a matter of opinion, and unless I actually would request BMs opinion on how I should run my household, I'm not interested, and again, the reverse applies as well. We all have the right to our opinions, but expressing any type of opinion to a child as how the other parent should run their household? Well, if you do it to them, how can you not expect them to retaliate by doing it to you? And once that starts happening, how can you possibly be certain that little disciplinary problem with "defiance", won't start escalating, until it's out of control? So we came to an understanding, that if the kids complained about the rules at the other parent's house or what they had to do was "unfair", we supported the other parents decision, and they supported ours, and we all kept our personal opinions to ourselves. It's not like we went overboard praising the other parents decisions, it was simply "their house, their rules," and basically discouraged this practice with the reminder, "what happens in Vegas should stay in Vegas." So, that's what we did, but again, we expected reciprocity, and received it....See MoreHU-429090758
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